It was knackering and irritable Friday. It started with literally dragging myself to accompany a friend for breakfast and then just managing to skip everything else after – lunch, afternoon tea and conversations with fellow colleagues.
I spent the day like a fly on the wall, blankly staring at either the cellphone or laptop screen and trying to appear busy in something in order to avoid conversations with those around me. When clock hit 5, i just grabbed my bag, didn’t even entertain the thought of walking till the busbay to catch office bus, booked a cab instead and hurtled home straight.
This was not normal me. The normal rambunctious me would never have skipped participating in games, would have already made plans for the weekend with gusto and would have enjoyed the Friday to the fullest.
The project had closed down 2 weeks back and the new project was yet to begin, which meant there was no work pressure, neither was the physical stress to blame. But there was surely something going on in the mind since few days, which was beyond comprehension, at least at this point in time, but was definately weighing on me like ton of bricks.
It was past 11.30 pm, but I could not fall asleep, there was lot of restlessness which was keeping me up and stressed. I realised I needed to get over this snake bite and the only person who could expel the venom out of me was me myself.
Ideally I would have headed for a long walk to be able to talk to myself and clear up my mind. But today I was totally drained out and additionally at 11.30 pm I was not sure how safe the streets of Pune would be to walk alone. So I just wimped out and decided to drive instead.
Watchman stopped me at the gate saying 1 lane will be closed for road repairs post 1 am and I may not be able to drive back in till 6 am if I don’t return by then. I thought to myself “that is ample time” and just thanked him and left.
Roads were all calm and quiet with very few vehicles around. Perfect crescent moon, clear sky, bright stars and slight chill in the air made up for an apt setup for me to clear up my mind and soul. The peaceful drive was helping me gradually remove all the chaos from my heart and fill it up with freshness and newfound zeal. It seemed as if moon, stars and the quiet were all there to give me my confident self back.
I could see my irritated face slowly morph into a smiling one and I realized it was now good time to head back home. On the gate watchman waved back asking “Madam, did you get what you were looking for?” and I happily nodded.
The much needed “me time” had served as catharsis for me. I was glad I did my “me time” therapy on time and didn’t spend the weekend sulking.